9/19 MON

I got 6 letters written today, it took about 3 hours. Then I read & thought.

The family and I have basically stopped even the attempt at communication, except at meals. I would put the responsibility mainly on me. Yet, this isn’t fair! The first 10 days, they & I tried vigorously to talk, now it’s only a tolken attempt each day. I try not to read so much, but there is little else to do.

If I go outside – I’m a tourist. And the kids are in school. My French isn’t good enough to keep even the semblance of a conversation going, so after a while, everyone just looks at one another, then they leave the room.

I suppose I could sit around and watch TV with them, but that isn’t communication.

Shit.
Shit.
Shit.
Shit!

I’m in a rut.



(Remember that dream you woke up with – is Sig’s middle name Alexandra? Why did your subconscious bring it up?)